Best Sex in a Pan

Best Sex in a Pan is a retro church-supper classic, the kind of layered icebox dessert your aunt used to bring out in a 9×13 pan and watch disappear before dinner ended. Five distinct layers each do a specific job: a buttery walnut shortbread for crunch, a sweet cream cheese and whipped topping band for tang, vanilla pudding for sweetness, chocolate pudding for richness, and a final Cool Whip cloud topped with shaved chocolate.

The crust is the only baked part. Everything else stacks cold, so the trick is patience. Each pudding layer needs to set briefly before the next goes on, otherwise you get marble swirl instead of clean stripes, and that visual layering is half the appeal when you cut into it.

Kitchen Tips

• Soften the cream cheese fully on the counter. Cold cream cheese refuses to whip smooth and you’ll see lumps in the second layer.
• Whisk the pudding mixes for the full two minutes the box demands, then let them firm briefly before spreading. Loose pudding bleeds into the cream cheese layer.
• Toast the walnuts before pressing them into the crust. Raw walnuts taste flat against this much sugar.
• Refrigerate at least 4 hours before slicing, overnight is better. The layers firm up and a clean knife gives clean slices.

Variations

• Swap walnuts for pecans in the crust for a softer, sweeter base.
• Use butterscotch pudding in place of vanilla for a deeper caramel note.
• Press a layer of crushed Oreos between the cream cheese and pudding for extra crunch.