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Easiest Bread You Can Possibly Make. No Joke Senior

 
39

I will be honest, I've had my fair share of bread disasters. Probably in the high 20's by now. My bread maker was a gift from the heavens. However...something about making my own bread is just so satisfying. I feel like dancing around with butter dripping down my face and my slice of bread held high singing I maaade this baaaby!!!!!" This recipe is idiot proof, my wiener dog could probably figure it out...ok no. This bread is rustic looking and delicious!

Yield

4

servings

Prep

10

min

Cook

30

Ready

10

min

 

Ingredients

-3 cups bread flour (I sometimes do half spelt half whole wheat for lower gluten content)
-1/4 tsp instant yeast
-1 tsp salt
-1 and 1/2 cups lukewarm water

Directions

Measure out your flour in a large bowl, sprinkle your yeast and salt over top of the flour. Add your water...and now comes the hardest part....stir that thing like your life depends on it for like 30 seconds until all the flour is moistened and incorporated into the dough. It will look shaggy, sticky, and unappealing. Wrap your little dough child up by putting some saran wrap or tea towel over the top of the bowl and leave it be for 12 to 18 hours (overnight is ideal) where there is no drafts or cold air. Once this is done, gently move the dough onto a floured surface, wet ur hands so no sticky, grab the dough and fold all the ends into the middle and flip it over so u have a nice little smooth round blob. Choose a pan or bowl and place tea towel inside, put your bread baby inside to rise for 2 more hours.

If you let it rise in smaller pan with higher sides you will get a bread with smaller circumference but greater height, were talkin like 5 to 6 inches. If u pick a wide thing you'll just have a wider circumference and 3 to 4 inches high.

Ok, pay attention. After about an hour and a half I preheat my oven to 450℉ (230℃). I use a great big heavy stainless steel pot with a lid...you can use any shape pot as long as it can with stand heat and has a lid. I stick it in there while its preheating. Dont use anything with plastic OBVIOUSLY people. Some pots tell you what heat they can with stand...mine doesnt but she hasnt failed me after many goes. Take your hot pot carefully out of the oven when youre dough is done rising. Throw some parchment paper on the bottom if you have it and flour the bottom lightly. Parchment isnt a must but I love that stuff like I love life. Plop your baby blob into the pot, dont worry what it looks like, it always looks cooler once it bakes. Bake it covered for a half hour, then uncover and bake for 15 to 20 min. It should sound hollow inside! And before you know it WHAMMO you made bread!

Earthbalance butter...plus a couple/five slices of bread and you got yourself a good time.

 

* not incl. in nutrient facts

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Comments

sean

Most entertaining directions I've read in a long time!

over 7 years ago
 

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